How to Get Kinky When You’re Short on Time

For some people, getting kinky involves elaborate role-play games, sexy costumes or lingerie, a bunch of bondage gear, and, most importantly, plenty of time. But the reality is that most of us just don’t have the kind of time we’d like to for our sexy fun.

You don’t have to skip your kinky fantasies when you have no time. Instead, get your needs met in short bursts. It might not be enough to fully satisfy you, but hopefully, it will keep you feeling good until you have more time to play.

Here are some ideas to try.

Easy Bondage

Love an elaborate rope scene or all the excitement of blindfolds, cuffs, and long-time play? Yeah, it’s fun, but what do you when you don’t have time for that? Go with easier bondage options instead. Don’t think of it as laziness or not trying hard enough; recognize it as being efficient.

• Use your body weight to pin your partner to the bed. Hold their hands over their head or sit on top to keep them still.
• Keep bed restraints under or around your bed so you can easily snap your partner into place. Have a quickie or tease them for a few minutes until they beg for more. It gets really sadistic when you have to stop “too soon” because time is up, and they’re left wanting more.

Dirty Talk

A lot of kinky play is mental. Yes, there are sensations to feel and toys to use, but a lot of the action happens in our minds first. You can use this even when you have no time to get naked or pull out a toy. Use dirty talk to get into their head and help you both get ready for whatever you decide to do when you’re together. The best part is you only need the amount of time it takes to get the words out.

• Sext your partner if you’re separated. In between meetings or when you have a few moments, tell them all the kinky things you want to do with them.
• Lean over and whisper into their ear. Call them all the kinky names they love. Tell them what you plan to do with them later. If you can (and if they consent) do this when there’s no way to be alone with each other. It ramps up the anticipation and the teasing.

Quick Spankings

If you’re a spanko, you might really prefer long spanking scenes where you take your time, use plenty of toys, and draw out the moment for as long as possible. But most of us live a life of work, kids, roommates, errands, and a million and one distractions. So how are you supposed to get your kink on when you have no time? Go for a quick spanking instead.

• A few short smacks on the butt don’t replace a bare-handed spanking, but they’ll remind the spankee “who’s boss.”
• Over the knee might be a classic but you also might not have time for it. Hold your partner against the wall or bent over the bed and smack their butt instead.

Paddles and other toys are encouraged but entirely optional, especially if you don’t want to waste time getting them out.

Give or Follow Orders

In any kinky moment, one person is in charge, and the other person gives up control. You can play with dominance and submission even without the elaborate role play game or time for hot sex. It’s as simple as giving or following an order (consensually, of course). It doesn’t even have to be specifically about sex, as long it turns both of you on. But it definitely can be as sexy as you want.

• Tell your partner to undress for you or do a striptease in front of you.
• Ask your partner to bring you something from another room.
• Give them directions on what you want them to do while you’re at work or running an errand.

If this kind of thing turns you both on and fits with your kinks, you can fit it into your busy schedule in small ways as often as you want. It might not be the same as the sexy BDSM scene you crave, but it’s better than nothing.

Conclusion

Time to get kinky with each other is a luxury we don’t always have available. You don’t have to skip out on your favorite BDSM fun, though. A bit of creativity and a willingness to enjoy bite-size kink that takes less time can fill the gap until you have time to indulge in your fantasies.